Pahn is with
the kind
older woman
preparing
his life
for the meeting
with the other
older woman
who is
exacting
with authority
at the Department
of Motor Vehicles
He plays in and out
of the yard
neat
and green
under a cloudy sky
with paved walks
and friendly neighbors
Coming inside
for instruction
and encouragement
She tells him
it is time
and he goes
into the garage
where his sister
has parked the car
gray
and curved
deep
in the courses of autos
He is thinking
it is a Ford from the fifties
a plain four-door
but then he thinks
it must be more recent—
a fifty-nine
because
he was born that year
or a sixty-four
because
by then he was old enough
to remember
For a moment
it is just one wheel
a motorcycle
wouldn’t that make it a
unicycle?
then he finds the rest of
the car
He climbs in
sitting small
on the gray leather bench
in the low light
seeing how clean
and empty it is
old
but in excellent condition
He lies hidden awhile…
…In the house again
the older woman advises him
to bring in the seats
through the kitchen
without sign
of food
or hunger
The dining room stools
stacked
as if unused
He finds the chairs
bringing them
just inside the family room
to sit
Now they seem small
for
him
but softer
This is
an older person’s house
with a child in it
a place where he belongs
but feels like a visitor
almost
as if
she is his guardian
but not his mother
He goes
out the kitchen door
into the dark
forest
of Sequoia
sempervirens
in the quiet
of the canyon
a river
into the kitchen
He doesn’t know
if he is inside
or out
Forgetting the Ford
he looks
into the dapple
walking up
the creek
along the path
of the rangers
a respected member
of
woodland society
seeing
a hollow
redwood snag
char and moss
rising
from the stream
of
gravel
and ripples
open
on the near side
with rivulets
running out
it seems like a home
the back wall
of the tree
a fireplace
turning
into
a water fall
an island
of fern
and stone
in the stream
surrounded
by the circle
of wood
in the middle
of the creek
as if
he is walking
into a vulval
shrine
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