Gazebo

…In a gym      

there are many people

seated             

on the floor      

                                                  Pahn is swinging

                                                above them

                                         in wide circles

                                                        holding

                                  a single rope

            finding                       

              that he can pump

                                to increase his speed

                     or change his direction

He weaves

                                         with the music

        becoming

                            a part of a show

                                           learning as he goes

His performance

is uneven

            occasionally

                   hitting the walls

and losing

            the rhythm

           

                when the music stops

                                  he glides gracefully

            (if a little late)

           

                                                           to the floor

by the wall       

     fading         

                        hopefully                                              

                            into the audience                           

He sees        there are women

changing          

     desperately 

                                       into street clothes

He catches glimpses

of their breasts 

                        arms

                        calves

                       

Pahn starts changing too

                    While in his underpants

a biker-blonde                            

walks up in front of him

   wild hair       

         and leather cleavage

leaning             

smiling with challenge

What is Pahn thinking?

First he is nervous

then hopeful of her nudity

then                 

           that it is for him to act next

        to show his sex

then                 

      that his privates

might be too dirty

to be shown

Before Pahn can take off his shorts

She reaches down

       pulls the elastic band

and empties compost

                           from a pouch

onto his pubis

…

Climbing a hill

                   to a high school garden

                   a party

                                                As the crowds subside

Pahn finds Djuturna

sitting on a bench

           still talking to a friend

He comes into her view

but she seems to ignore him

He sits down next to her                            

but she gets up               

as if to leave

then she turns toward him

                             smiles                     

                                  approaching

He tells her                                       

“I need to talk to you”

They walk                                        

to a gazebo                         

past a small ravine

                      with xerophytic native plants

            planted by students

Here

 they sit                                       

on wooden benches

as he tells her   

                 his explanations

Her attention drifts                  

She gets up     

walks around   

sits again                               

                       

 Then they both get up to leave

it is now

that he remembers

that he has a class

this evening      

                     and he is already late

He thinks                              

for a minute     

       that it is not as important

        as talking to her

but decides                            

he must go       

She looks angry     when he tells her

and starts to walk away

                       

He calls to her in panic

                       

                                          saying                                         

                       

                           “I am getting my degrees

                               because I want to teach words”

And she says                               

                             “There aren’t enough jobs

                          for people who teach words”

And she turns away again

He wants to touch her back

        put his hand

                                      on her dark blue sweater

        turn her around

but he is afraid 

                                  to touch her—

      he doesn’t know

               if it is all right   

                            to touch her

He places his hand

                            on her back

just the same   

                       because

    he is            

                                      desperate for her to face him

She turns to him…                        

                       

…climbing into his lap

     telling him   

           that she wanted to marry

             and have ten children

speaking like a child

acting weak

and silly

And Pahn realizes

                                     that she isn’t Diuturna anymore

                      because Djuturna

             is strong

                             and not manipulative

                              expects nothing

Pahn still knows                                          

that Djuturna is present in this woman

somewhere

He wants to give her more

                       

He kisses her                                

meekly at first  

then

with deep engagement

because he wants

her to know

his lips

and how he would

                  give them to her

His penis                              

     begins to swell                 

and he knows  

  she can feel it 

            against her thigh

He is a little afraid                  

but glad           

    because       

he wants          

            her to know that he wants her

and he’s sure

             it is all right now

because now he’s sure